Long Dong Silver Rides Again

Uncle Thomas and the House Negro Last Crusade

Among some of the rankest of the rank right-wing subterranean sewage that runs through the darkest recesses of the internet has been the ridiculous allegation that President Elect Barack Obama is unqualified to be hold the presidency due to his not being an actual American citizen. This two-faceted disinformation campaign (one focusing on some sort of mysteriously forged birth certificate) was dealt a serious setback when the fascist bloc on the Supreme Court refused to hear a case by one Leo Donofrio seeking to challenge the very definition of what constitutes citizenship. You have to love these fascists, when all else fails they change the rules, kind of like the sniveling little brats who would take their football and run home to mommy if the game got too rough back when we all were kids, I am sure that you know the type. A bunch of whiny bitches and bastards with heads full of lame conspiracy theories, a constant sense of being the aggrieved parties in some grandiose librul conspiracy to overthrow the land of Murka and a sense of victimhood that justifies the very existence of the pharmaceutical industry because let’s face it: these sort of people are just plain fucking nuts. The culture of crybabies.

That this bullshit would end up in basically the same Supreme Court (minus of course one Placidyl lobotomized corpse walking William Rehnquist but plus two more ultra fascists in Roberts and Alito) that illegitimately installed one George W. Bush as our king and therefore made us into subjects would be fitting. Longtime water-carrier for the white man and self-hating house Negro Clarence ‘Uncle’ Thomas was reportedly revved up to allow Donofrio’s airing of his dirty diapers and fellow veteran scurvy dog of Uncle Sam’s plantation, Alan Keyes has also filed a suit challenging Obama’s citizenship but discretion won out for the time being anyway, the court denied the case without comment. Not that the embittered Thomas gives a rat’s ass about his legacy though, his pathetic servitude set aside for at least the time being this man never had any business even being confirmed, especially not with the ugly little business that Clarence was a closet porno freak who especially reveled in the exploits of one Long Dong Silver. The confirmation hearings were brutal but the fascists had a superior grass roots movement, more clout within the system, the puppet master himself Poppy Bush presiding over a burgeoning shadow government and a media that had been reconfigured into one giant motherfucker megaphone so this degenerate was allowed to slither onto the bench.

Of course Thomas and Keyes are pissed off and it is understandably so, their act as the ‘responsible Negroes’ has been nullified by a black man with merits, intelligence and an actual claim to being one of the smartest men in America with his successful presidential bid. There has to be no shortage of umbrage with those favor currying black men who have spent their entire lives serving as foot stools for the Chivas sipping, Wall Street Journal reading, Lexus driving Thurston Howell III country club (blacks or Jews not accepted of course) set who run the oligarchy and launder the ill gotten gains of the empire. The election of Barrack Obama solely on merit is a novel concept indeed to the ‘Toms’ and ‘lawn jockeys’ who have for too long played both ends against the middle in the ongoing nightmare of institutionalized racist America and they like the washed up whores reduced to sucking cock at a deep discount (‘chicken-neck in street slang) to feed their crack habits have now hit bottom.

I want to take this chance to refer to the late, great Hunter S. Thompson’s Gonzo fever dream riff on the psychologically damaged, overly-infatuated with pussy, marathon fuck sessions, bestiality and the superhuman exploits of the black counterpart to Johnny Wadd Holmes that was Long Dong Silver entitled Fear and Loathing in Elko. Clarence Thomas is a fucking disgrace, my personal opinion is that he would make Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. vomit so malodorously rotten he is, so counter to the very concept of black progress, so contemptuous to civil rights, he is in the spirit of the holidays, the proverbial triple-decker toadstool sandwich with arsenic sauce.

We haven’t heard the end of this Obama citizenship thing either, not by a longshot, according to a front page right-wing propaganda piece in my local fish wrapper, The St. Petersburg Times (a once proud newspaper brought low during the Jeb Bush years) that is too long to be anything other than an orchestrated and furious last ditch effort by the rotten fascists who have sucked the blood from this country. The writer is one Wes Allison whose history and intentions need to be sufficiently scrutinized because the very last sentence of this piece states that Dick Cheney’s hunting buddy, Fat Tony Scalia is going to take on another case, Wrotnowsky vs. Bysiewicz into conference on Friday. Nice that the locals had a massive delivery surcharge slapped onto us last year so that we could get a print version of the Drudge Report parked on our doorstep like a prank flaming bag of dogshit. Any ‘news’ organization (not the the SPT Times is the only one but I am more pissed off as a subscriber who has to pay good money to subsidize this short of vile shit – BTW they also mailed out that militant Zionist DVD ‘Obsession’ a few months back) that helps to further thing retarded piece of right wing trash needs to be keelhauled just for general principles.

The one thing that I did like in the Wes Allison piece was his reference to the pathetic loser who was helping to pimp this abortion, one certifiable reich wing buffoon, Roger Bredow of Asscrack, PA or some other backwoods shithole enclave of bitter guns n god volk (he is actually pictured in a Dr. Seuss style Uncle Sam hat – red, white and blue elephant condom would have been more apropos) or some other bumfuck haven of the inbred was actually referred to as not fucking get this… “an internet publisher” because he was able to put up a dipshit website and a slanderous and feeble minded excuse for a YouTube video so all you bloggers take this to heart: you are ALL now officially INTERNET PUBLISHERS which should be immediately added to your resumes, especially now when perspective employees are required to not only jump through flaming hoops for jobs but also must blow peanuts across the floor for the amusement of some dipshit human resources generalist with a degree in basketweaving or something even more worthless – an MBA degree.

But I digress….

And while I’m on the subject of Toms, has there ever been a bigger one that Orenthal J. Simpson? Living large in his Brentwood home with his cokehead trophy wife and doing stupid pet tricks for whitey the Juice had it made until it all fell apart one ugly and bloody night in the early summer of 1994. A made for the new tabloid Murkan media circus, the long, slow drive to nowhere in the infamous white Bronco, the perverse intellectual rape of the ongoing trial, the travesty of the verdict and the moronic waste of tax money that was the most grossly botched prosecution in modern memory and a new legend had been made. In his post football career during which he was the life of the party for the high rolling Caucasian clowns who run the circus, appearing in bad movies and building a very successful career as a non-threatening black pitchman for products the Juice never managed to achieve the level of global stardom that his reputed killing spree kicked off. That O.J. Simpson ever became any sort of a symbol for injustices against blacks by the white legal system was always an enigma, it wasn’t like he ever wanted to be anything but the shuck and jive, happy go lucky celebrity that he was and didn’t do jack shit for the black community but that is a far more complex story and for another time. Granted the disparity between just the type of jurisprudence that blacks face versus that which whites do is a travesty, but the bigger travesty is the disparity between the rich and the poor.

Faced with the full fury of the criminal justice system O.J. did what any other millionaire would do, he hired the best and dirtiest team of goddamned snake lawyers that he could find and with much chicanery and theatrics beat the rap – of course having grand dragon Mark Fuhrman, the now retired L.A. police detective and full time bigot on the witness stand was a boon The entire Simpson trial was a sad commentary on the decade of the 90’s, the period in time when Americans were set up for what was to come like billiard balls on a table by the sharks who run the system. It’s ability to provide that hit of electronic crack to a nation of attention deficit stricken lizard brained sheep would bring us such follow ups as Susan Smith who drowned her kids in a car and blamed it on black men, the long-running cash cow of the Jon Benet Ramsey investigation and the amazing adventures of Laci and the fetus among many, many others. It was a decade of sloth, sin and sleaze and the tabloidism eventually spilled over into politics with good ole bubba Bill Clinton along with the entire system dragged through the shit after he had the idiotic indiscretion to receive a series of sleazy blow jobs from that chubby little trollop Monica Lewinsky, a young woman so pathetic and immature that she actually saved a blue dress that Bill had blown his wad on as though it were the fucking shroud of Turin.

But I am rambling now, what I am getting at is that last week’s verdict and subsequent sentencing of up to 33 years in prison for his participation in an armed confrontation over sports memorabilia. Whitey’s revenge. Simpson should have known better, it was crystal clear to all but the blindest of the blind that he was being watched very carefully and any minor fuckup would be pounced on but when the damned imbecile used a gun during the commission of the crime (which has always smelled like a setup) he might as well have just thrown himself over the fence into the tiger pit at his local zoo and let them rip him limb from limb. He has always been playing with five fouls ever since he was able to get away with murder in an ugly national spectacle that people still haven’t gotten over.

Look, I can’t say that O.J. was actually guilty of murder, I wasn’t there, I do however believe very strongly that he either did it or was involved, the evidence doesn’t lie and despite the Gestapo that is the LAPD the story of them planting of it all just to frame Simpson has always been ludicrous. O.J. may have snapped but the bitch was pushing him, flaunting it and it is totally understandable that it happened, I mean how many similar murders over domestic problems occur every day? This one just happened to involve celebrity and biracial marriage to boot. O.J. at the very least was an accessory to murder and walked pretty much scot free due to the Johnnie Cochran and the ‘Dream Team’ who rolled in with an assemblage of the dirtiest legal rat bastards and the best expert witnesses that money could buy , a multi-million dollar cottage industry built on the trial, the saturation bombing by paparazzi that launched the long running writing and/or cable television careers of dozens (including the insipid Great Van Susteren who should visit the Juice at least weekly during his prison stay to blow him after all that he has done for her career) and a riled up largely black jury out for payback and to send a message to the fascist pigs of the Los Angeles Police Department, a bunch of jack-booted thugs if there ever was one. On top of all of that the gross incompetence of the Los Angeles District Attorneys office should be a case study for future lawyers for decades on how NOT to run a trial. It was an abject farce Marcia Clark and company were the most inept bunch in modern legal history and wouldn’t have been able to get a conviction even if the squad cars would have rolled up to find the Juice with his dick in the mouth of Nicole’s freshly severed head.

That was then though and this is now, Simpson was railroaded after rubbing whitey’s face in a big steaming pile of fresh shit when the glove didn’t fit. This latest verdict is the same sort of Jim Crow style racist bullshit that is shovels of bloody meat thrown to the masses of asses each and every single time that a black celebrity athlete manages to fuck up enough to become a public spectacle. The names Kobe Bryant, Michael Vick and most recently Plaxico Burress immediately come to mind and are regularly strung up the yardarm by the balls as an example to the low minded scum inhabitants of Apartheid white Murka that the justice system really works by the gang of thugs jackals and pirates who run the rigged game. The game is only able to continue by feeding on smoldering racial resentment with religion always thrown in to keep the peasants pitted against each other while the treasury is sucked dry by vampires like Hank Paulson and his ilk at Goldman Sachs. The sheep always have had a taste for lamb chops when served up smothered in racism. The fucking hypocrisy of it all is astounding.

Simpson got railroaded, that is exactly what this is about, the last charge of a dying breed of the stupid white men who have bankrupted the country, turned us all into a bastardized combination of a global pariah and historical joke, a master race of lepers whose only saving grace when the future historians drag our bloated carcasses onto the autopsy table will be that we never quite were as bad as the Nazis, granted the envelope was being pushed very seriously but when Tom DeLay and his vile scum were dealt a humiliating blow at the battle over Terri Schiavo the mastodon had been mortally wounded and was already lurching towards the graveyard.

The Simpson verdict though was sweet indeed to far too many, a large percentage of them view it as some sort of perverted form of payback for Obama’s ascendance to the highest office in the land. It’s all a rigged game and while there is high-fiving and jubilation in peckerwood nation over taking down the Juice too many people who are being dragged down by a cunningly disguised long-running drive to spread economic disparity and bust the backs of the working class will never be able to get it through their Neanderthal skulls one very important fact – we are all niggers to the masters of Uncle Sam’s plantation.